Yes I am a worthless ass. I feel like a tottal dick. Why do I only hear what I want to hear? Only see what I want to see? I don't get it. I try to be a good person, to do what I should but do I? Noooooooo. I mean what's the point? Guy's either go for girls with looks or personality and I have neither. Did I really think I'd get a boyfriend? That I would get over him? He hates me. I can't get over it. I don't want him to. I should dislike her but I can't she's too nice. I should dislike him the ass, but I can't. Dear goodness what the hell was I thinking?

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You know that guy? The one that I blogged about? I just read a post of his that says he's in drama. ?????? I'm in drama. So what's going on? I know he's either in grade 11 or 12 so if he is in drama we'd be in the same class???? So is he someone in my class? Or is he in a different class? Or maybe I'm losing it.

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Not in a good mood today. MONDAYS ARE THE WORST. I totally flopped it in drama, forgetting more than one line and mumbling my words. I got so nervous I feel like a complete loser. All my friends could talk about was the awesome party they went to on Sat. (I wasn't invited) and all the fun they had there. While I was sitting at home while my MOM and DAD partied with my uncle. So everyone had an awesome time while I stayed and watched dumb movies.

AND whenever I ask to come over and do something my friends always have an excuse. It makes me feel lame. LIKE OK, COME ON! This sucks ass. Now I'm at the fucking library, wasting my time. And I'll get picked up, and then go on to babysit my lame brother and sister, who can't seem to get along and always yells at me. WTF??!! THIS SUCKS.

WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP DITCHING ME? AM I THAT BORING? EMBARRASSING? LIKE SHIT ALL I WANTED WAS TO HAVE SOME FRIENDS AND GO OUT AND DO TEENAGER THINGS. IS THAT SO WRONG????????????????????????

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